Dana’s teenage son, Elliott, was nearly consumed by nihilistic networks on the internet — under her watch. It was horrifying and shocking, she told NPR. Then 14, the high school freshman was struggling with the transition to ninth grade. His parents were splitting up and his friend group was splintering. In search of support, Elliott joined groups online that eventually prompted and encouraged his severe mental decline. (NPR used only Elliott’s first name because he is a minor.)

Eliott was seeking community and Dana had no reason to suspect he would fall into a toxic abyss. “He had always managed his time online, (and his) time playing video games, really well on his own, because he had so many interests that weren’t digital,” she said, including music, art and books. 

Plus, she’d done so much right. He had a smartphone, but she’d set up parental controls banning certain websites and limiting his time online. She knew he’d joined online communities for fans of black metal music and that was fine, she thought. The people in it seemed friendly and supportive of Elliott, initially.

But later, Dana said, those same people sent Elliott to dark online content, known as “gore” sites, that distorted his worldview. “They get you to follow these different accounts and view these different websites, and the algorithms just help that process along,” Dana told NPR. “And it creates – where you’re so flooded with this content – it desensitizes you to violence.” They urge violence too, first against one’s self. The small cuts that Dana noticed Elliott had made in his arms were her first sign that something was terribly wrong. 

She told the therapist Elliott was seeing, and together, they created a safety plan. Dana also locked up items he might use to hurt himself. But the self-harm didn’t stop. He also started to behave in ways that contradicted his character, like launching verbal tirades against LGBTQ+ people, despite his friend group being mostly LGBTQIA, and lamenting that life was hopeless. Dana said it was all “very unlike him. He’s always been very clear about having meaning and purpose.”

Elliott and Dana’s experience isn’t unique. The FBI issued a warning earlier this year about the growing strength of “violent online networks” that target minors and other vulnerable people. In the last four years, these networks have been linked to roughly 50 criminal cases around the world, ranging from a coordinated plan to bomb a Lady Gaga concert in Brazil to at least 20 in the United States, including school shootings and a series of arsons in Wisconsin committed by a 12-year-old. Suicides have also been linked to these communities. 

The greatest weapon used against youth and others who are vulnerable is manipulation, added Cynthia Miller-Idriss, who runs the Polarization & Extremism Research & Innovation Lab (PERIL) at American University. Once convinced they are loved and cared for by the online group, the brainwashed youth are hooked – and encouraged to victimize their peers. 

While law enforcement can deal with subsequent criminal activity, they can’t address the underlying issues. Attempts to curb free speech are ineffective, according to the Bipartisan Policy Center, which calls on the government to gather intelligence on these online hate groups and to promote community-building and awareness of their dangers among the public. Experts say reducing harm requires a coordinated public health program between local, state, and federal government, addressing underlying societal issues.

Though the road to Elliott’s recovery has been long and bumpy, Dana said she finally feels like he’s reached a point where she’s confident he will be OK – now, she’s she’s sharing their story to warn other parents: Your kid is not immune. “I feel like when I talk about it, I get one of two reactions. One is, ‘That can never happen to us because we have parental controls, the screen time (limits), and our kid would never do something like that,'” she said. “Or two, ‘I had no idea that something like this could happen. Please tell me more. I want to learn.'”

See also:

Breaking Away From Hate